Romancing Yourself...

Valentine's Day hasn't been a huge deal to me since 6th grade which was the last year we got to make Valentine's Day boxes out of shoe boxes.  I was so excited when February came around.  I was (and am not now) artistic, so this activity gave me a chance to really have fun since you can't really screw up gluing doilies and cutting out a zillion construction paper hearts.  I still remember my last one and how fun it was when we got to hand out our valentine's.  Everyone was required to give one to each child so no one ever felt left out.  Those were simpler times.

My husband and I will be going to eat at Waffle House.  It really is fun for us since it opened about a year ago and in our little part of the world, this was big news in our small town.  It is affordable, no need to call for reservations, is only packed during breakfast, and the cook doesn't know the meaning of low-fat, sugar-free, or cholesterol.  My kind of cook.  It is our own little private joke and we enjoy the heck out of it.

I have thought a lot today about how differently I feel about Valentine's Day.  It is a day devoted to love.  What a wonderful thing to celebrate.  There isn't anything that requires anyone to have a significant other, spouse, or partner in order to indulge ourselves with candy, flowers, perfume, fancy jammies, elegant jewelry, new book or dinner out at a fancy restaurant.  I gave myself permission years ago to romance myself.  I had help.  There is a book that is called Romancing the Ordinary by Sarah Ban Breathnach.  She is one of those people, like Marianne Williamson, who is living and sharing her gifts every day.  It is worth reading if you don't know how to love and indulge "you".  This isn't about buying things or attaching ourselves to someone to fill that space inside.  We have all we need to fill ourselves up with passion and excitement about the unique, perfect and dazzling beings that we are.  I cannot write well enough to convey how strongly I feel about this or the quiet, life changing shifts in my own self-reflection that I have grown into. 

If you have yourself to romance on Monday, then you have the most wonderful person in the world to share it with.  What do you love to do?  What really makes you happy?  What aromas would you surround yourself with that bring back those happy memories?  Baking bread, fragrant flowers, mown grass, steaks simmering on the grill?  Is there anything that you have in your house that is no longer bringing you peace or happiness?  Pictures that need to be replaced?  Knick knacks that are no longer touchstones.  Is there anything that surrounds you that you need to let go of because it no longer adds to your life.  We can't make room for all the wonderful moments that the Universe has for use if we cling to old, worn-out, negative stuff that no longer works for us.  We are meant to be loved and loving.  We have the choice to take charge of loving ourselves or submitting to the lie that we need "something or someone" to make us whole, happy and complete.  We, you and I, are already whole, happy and complete.  Sometimes we just need to stop and remember that we are who we are meant to be and if we aren't at peace, serene or happy..well...do something different.

I think I'm going to make a Valentine's Box tomorrow.  It won't be perfect but I bet my husband finds me with a silly smile on my face when I am done and present it to him.  I am going to romance myself on Monday in all sorts of ways.  I might even send myself a Valentine's Card via email.  I will also attempt to rid my home of one thing that no longer brings me happiness, peace or a smile.  I will also add one thing that I love.  I hope you do the same.

Happy Valentine's Day, dear friend, you are loved.